||[Mar. 6th, 2007|03:41 am]
It occurs to me that there are a million problems in people I know that I would like to fix, but why bring them to their attention when there are a million things I can fix about myself. Lets weigh the cost vs. benefits:|
If someone, in any respective manner, points out what another is doing wrong (even with good intentions) what are the results?
-The person is diminished, they feel like they are being made inferior.
-Their pride is demolished; for why would they do the things seen as negative unless they thought they were just in doing so? (Al Capone, until the day he died believed he was a service man to the people. He believed everything he did was just.)
-They may retaliate, so as to defend their position - EVEN IF they know they know they are wrong, their pride is at stake and they will battle till death.
-If they ultimately admit that they are wrong, they will hold resentment towards the accuser and continue to believe as they always did.
-The accuser may feel just in terms of helping a friend, but ultimately the friendship/relationship is ruined and neither party has gained.
In not focusing on others faults (especially with good intentions):
-The person will better themselves by working to fix their own faults.
-They won't create enemies by depicting what is wrong with others.
-They will make friends with just about everyone they know - A friend always ignores your flaws.
-Just as you look up to your friends, they will lead as example, and others will learn to fix their problems themselves based on the example led. Not by being told what to do.
Every person I didn't like, or I have judged, has judged me at some point. Same goes for everyone.
I vow to henceforth do the best I can to never point out anothers flaw or speak ill of anyone. Furthermore I promise to do the best I can to make everyone I know aware of their good qualities. I ask that I be corrected when I don't live up to this, if you catch me, I'll give you 25 cents.
-Dwayne P Cullen